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05 June 2009 @ 03:23 am
now what?  
i've been out of school for 2 years, and i still don't know what i want to be.

"should i do what i love, or do what i do (so i can do what i love on the side?)"

i graduated at the age of 19 with a degree in Mass Communication. My school did not have majors, so i knew a little about everything, but i didn't know what i liked. i always knew i wanted to be a writer, and looking through my transcript i did excel at english and writing classes. however, with the economy the way it is, writing will not put food on the table even if i work for major newspapers. i told myself, i'll put writing on the back burner and try to earn first, so i entered a call center to earn while sending out articles to magazines, work on my story ideas, but when i started working, that plan just flew out the window.

now i'm not as confident as i was, since i feel like i wasted my time and now there are better, younger writers out there. also, now i'm envious of some of my batchmates who started their career immediately after graduation and now have good positions in media networks. i keep thinking i used to be better than they were in college, i had better grades, but now thay have the better career and i'm still here, yes, maybe earning more, but still confused.

my parents got sick of my downward slump after my resignation, and basically i was badgered into entering law school they told me, you want to be a writer because that's what you're good at, so why don't you put that skill to use as a lawyer? (parang malabo yung argument no? haha)
once they forced me to agree, they also basically forced me to fend for myself financially. How? What work would give me enough money to be able to send myself to law school? Yes, that's right. Back to the call center.

So now, if ever, i would say that i'm worse that i was when i graduated. At least when i graduated i sort of knew where i was. Now i'm going to study for a course i don't know if i want and paying for it by work i know i don't like.

does anyone have any advice for me? Feel free to PM. BTW, school starts monday.